Elders and Expectations

My brother, the one who I grew up trying to aspire to become. He was my idol, hero, and this intangible, talented boy.

At a young age I didn’t really understand the possibility or actuality of never being as good as my brother. Not only because he was older than me but also because he was just good at everything even as a child. It was a nice excuse for me, “M**h’s only better than you because he was born first.”

He was always so creative that I never really found Legos to be all that fun when I played with him. He learned to talk and read at an earlier age than I did and read almost every book we had in the house (he even tried to read one of my mom’s medical books). He learned and mastered the guitar and piano in 3 months (at separate times) just because he wanted to.


It was always like that with him.

He grew up to be a very intelligent student that could pick up all the new math concepts and got A’s and at the very least B’s in most of his AP (Advanced Placement) classes. He was also pretty popular at his high school. He had a huge group of friends because he didn’t really know how to be exclusive. Friendly and smart. That was my brother.

Now, just to get this straight: He’s not dead.

I used the past tense because that was the best way to start off talking about the past (GRAMMAR CONVENTIONSSSS) but he’s not dead. Though it feels like it because he hasn’t been around….but that’s because he’s off to college (getting smarter, no doubt).

Now since you know a little about my dear jerk wad of an older brother, lemme explain where I’m going with all this.

When my brother was younger he was infatuated with cars. He had so many Hot Wheels and Motor Trend magazines my dad would talk to my brother (about 9 at the time) about cars and engines and ridiculous stuff that wasn’t about dinosaurs and why the sky was blue. I was still trying to finish Alphabet Mysteries

Absolutely. RIDICULOUS.

He loved cars so much that he drew them almost obsessively. He used to say “SIX TO NEUTRAL,” or “STN” (STN refers to the six gears of a manual car, going from the quickly from sixth gear to neutral, without messing up your car, is pretty WHOA) as a greeting. Lucky he stopped that after a couple of months. He watched and re-watched and re-watched the “2 Fast 2 Furious” movies just for the cars. JUST FOR THE CARS.


Whenever he got into something he REAAAALLY got into it. He went from LEGOs to Cars to guitars to bikes. When he dropped something he really DROPPED it, like a rock or a burning marshmallow. I say this because when he got really into art and drawing, I wasn’t really into it and his early drawings weren’t super great so I didn’t think I needed to challenge him (for those of you who don’t have siblings and think this kind of ideology is super messed up, it’s how it usually is).

I couldn’t find a picture of his earlier drawings so these are all pretty recent


Now I have an art blog and he’s off at college, with barely enough time for studying and watching anime (I know it seems like I infected him but it’s actually the other way around). He can still draw like nobody’s business but since he doesn’t have enough time he can’t put in the proper effort to better his craft. At the moment what really matters to him is getting his college diploma which is taking up a lot of his time and effort.

Maybe he can be talented at bio-engineering.



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